Bozeman, MT

Hello! It is after midnight here in Bozeman, MT....we just checked in to the Best Western Gran Tree and as you can see, we have free internet. The cats are happy to be out of their cage and I'm happy to be out of the car. :)

It was a pretty good day, we left Redmond around 11:15 this morning....ended up doing about 12 hours of driving. We stopped frequently for potty breaks and to just walk around. I don't know why it is but I absolutely love rest areas. I love seeing all of the different people there and wonder where they are headed to, things like that. Which by the way, most of them have wi-fi....so high tech. Well, I should say that I love most rest areas. The clean ones in particular. There was only one that we stopped at in the middle of no where that wasn't really clean and I wouldn't want to be there alone at night but all in all, two thumbs up on the rest areas.

We're having a good time considering all that is going on. We've got a list of all the state license plates that we've seen, list of road kill (gross I know), live animals (7 deer so far)....something else I can't think of right now.

It's funny, the gas prices go down the further east we get. Funny how that works.

Oh, we saw a very funny sign along the road earlier today around Missoula (I think)...it was for the "Testicle Festival" and it had a cartoon drawing of a bull with his legs crossed and his hands over his um, well his stuff. I got a chuckle out of that one.

There was a really cool little espresso stand/gift shop/pizza place/gas station/convenience store all in one....lots of cool little things in the gift shop but there is absolutely no extra room in the car for me to be buying anything.

There was one minor incident....a semi truck cut in front of us and then swerved back into the right lane and when he did, he kicked up a rock and it cracked the windshield on the passenger side which is where I was at the time....I ducked of course. ha ha. The crack is probably smaller than a dime and is down near where the windshield wiper rests. Oh-well, if that is the worst thing that happens along the way than I am grateful.

The kitties are doing pretty well. Sydney voiced her anger at the situation for an hour or so and then they both curled up together and looked cute. We tried to get them to at least drink some water but they weren't interested. They're currently wandering all over our hotel room and finally drinking and eating some dry food.

It was very hard to say goodbye to Harley today. :(

Kari called us and let us know that her, John & Little K stopped by our place to check on Harley and that he was hiding under the comforter in our bed when they got there. He loves to snuggle up in there. Kari said he's doing good and that makes me feel better. Thanks, Kari! Oh and by the way, Kari, there's a casino in this hotel but it's not a 'real' casino like we went to. ha ha

Well it's time for me to go to bed. Tomorrow's destination is Sioux Falls, SD....hopefully the hotel we get there has free internet service as well.

Goodnight!
M.

Sunday morning

I just can't say goodbye and leave it at that! ha ha ha : )

We're leaving in a few hours and I thought I'd give our "itinerary" for those that are interested....tonight we are planning on making it to Bozeman, MT. (Kaelee & Kari---I should probably call Matt Hense and see if he can take us in, if you talk to him tell him I said hi!) Monday night we are planning on making it to Sioux Falls, SD and Tuesday we will be driving to Manchester, IA which is where Amy lives....we're planning on being there some time in the afternoon and then spending the night with her & her family. Wednesday we will take off at a reasonable time in the morning from IA and then either drive like maniacs and end up in Lockport late Wednesday night or early Thursday. But I don't have a key yet to my grandpa's house so we may get in Thursday morning. We'll see.

Matt takes off early Friday morning, so in the time that he'll be in Lockport with me on Thursday he's going to help me get some stuff situated and maybe help with some shopping. I figure I will definitely need some help with the shopping part as my back still doesn't do well carrying all of the large crap I'm going to have to buy.

Okay, so I think this is really it for me until I get to New York....there's a slight chance that I may be able to use my laptop along the way in a hotel, so you just never know. I may surprise you and you'll hear from me sooner than you think!

Anyone living in Lockport, I'd love to know where I can get free wifi. That'd be sweet.

Everyone, hope you had a great weekend & thanks again! Oh, Kaelee---please be sure to tell you-know-who how very sorry I am that I did not get to give her a big whack on the head & say goodbye, it just breaks my heart. hee hee

Pizza Oven, here I come!!! :)

Love,
M.

P.S. Vote for Pedro.

Goodbye part 2

Yeah, so I always have something more to say.

Crap, I freaking hate saying goodbye. Kari and Kurtis just left after stopping by, she's going to be taking care of Harley while Matt is gone. As soon as her car drove off I started crying like a baby. I finally made a truly wonderful friend who is sane on top of it (the sane part has to do with a psycho I had met at my last job before Medtronic...Kari knows who I'm talking about) and now I'm leaving. Kari, if you are reading this I am going to miss you sooo much! And Kurtis too, he's my favorite little 1 year old in the whole world! :-(

Yesterday I stopped by Medtronic to say one last goodbye to the rest of my friends there....I was in much better spirits than I was on my last day of actually working there. Unfortunately Keno wasn't there, but I was able to hang out and chat with Kaelee & Barbara & Kari & Karen and....etc. It was nice.

After leaving Medtronic I went over to Kari's at 3pm and we headed off to drop Kurtis off at her sister's house and then we high-tailed it to Tulalip casino. We had very high hopes to win it big but sadly we didn't do very well at all. I even brought my little pink pig of my Grandpa's as good luck but even the luck of the pig didn't help us. Oh-well, we had a lot fun and that's all that matters. We picked Kurtis up after that and headed back to her place, had some pizza and some drinks and I spent the night. I love pajama parties!

It's funny because up until a few minutes ago I was 100% sure of my move to NY...now I'm wondering if I should have given WA a chance on my own. I'm sure it's just my emotions speaking but still...while I was having my little sob fest I realized that I don't have to stay in NY forever. The great part about starting over is that I can do anything that I want, anything at all! I can go to NY, be near my family as I know I will need their support and if 6 months or a year down the line I no longer want to live there, I can move. Like I said, I can do anything I want to, I don't have anything tieing me down to any place in particular. I have to admit it's a good feeling to know that my life is entirely up to me, hopefully it doesn't sound selfish but I don't have to worry about anyone else but myself from here on out. I like that. :)

Yeah, so the trunk of my car is all packed up and I think we thought we were going to have more room than we actually do. Oh-well, I'm sure Mr Organization will make it work. ha ha.

Had to make another trip to the UPS store to ship out all my wall hanging/picture frame-ish stuff....that ended up being a little over $100. Yikes! Oh-well, they packed it pretty well so it *should* get there in one piece. Cross fingers.

I was thinking I wanted to go to Ivar's or Cafe Veloce for dinner tonight but now I'm thinking of getting a Hawaiian pizza from Papa Murphy's and staying in. (I had one last night at Kari's....I so love them!)

Even though I'm so sad right now, I am truly happy with my decisions and I know that things will work out for me. It's just hard leaving good friends. Sucks ass.

Thanks again to all of you out here who have made Washington feel like home to me....it means the world to me.

Hugs to all of you,
Michelle

Goodbye...

This is going to be short but I just wanted to say goodbye to all of my friends out here in Seattle...thank you for everything. :)

We're hitting the road tomorrow morning....I'll write again when I can.

Bye, bye boxes!!

Good morning & happy Friday! I have just returned from the UPS store and shipped out my 14 boxes....I feel like a HUGE weight has been lifted. It was driving me crazy seeing all of those boxes piled up. I was figuring it would cost $500+ and was pleasantly surprised when it came to $401.01. Still a lot but definitely less than movers. Plus, they told me the boxes will be delivered on Friday, May 11th...a week from today, that surprised me as I figured it would take the standard "7-10 business days". It'll work out perfectly because I should be in Lockport no later than next Thursday, Matt takes off out of Buffalo back to Seattle on Friday morning so I'll be there to receive my boxes. Anyone want to help me unpack them? Kiara?? :) ha ha

I stopped at Starbucks on my way home and am enjoying my venti americano as I type. I've really cut down on going to Starbucks lately, I'm trying to be more fiscally responsible and make my coffee at home. I have to admit that it is going to be a challenge for me to have a budget and stick to it. I'm used to being a double income family and now it'll be just me....but I'm sure I'll manage. No more Coach bags or Prada sunglasses for quite some time! :)

I'm going over to Kari's at 3:00 today and then we'll take off to the casino and have a wonderful evening! I'm soooo looking forward to it. Everyone cross your fingers that we win big money!!!

Tomorrow is going to be CRAZY. Luckily Matt is a very organized person and will be very helpful tomorrow while we get everything into the car and tie up any loose ends. I will miss that about him, you can throw him in a room that is a total disaster and he'll have it in tip top shape in no time. We just remembered last night that we have to go to Bank of America and have my name taken off our joint account, oopsie we didn't think about that. Oh-well, it'll all get taken care of and work out.

I'm feeling much better than I did last night. The evenings seem to be the worst for me as far as my emotions running amuck.

I'll do my best to write tomorrow before we hit the road on Sunday morning but am not sure when I'll be able to write again after that.

To all my friends, I want to say how much I am going to miss you and how much I truly treasure our friendships and that I love each one of you! I am very good at keeping in touch so I know that none of us will lose touch.

Talk soon...

Thursday night

Today ended up being a pretty good day but I have to say that I do not like goodbyes. It's making me sad.

Jenna & I met up at US Nails for pedicures, I chose a color by OPI called "I'm not really a waitress"...I tend to pick colors based on their names. At first I wasn't happy with the color as I thought it was going to be a deeper red....but after getting home and looking at it more closely, I like it. I know, it was a close call on that one but it's okay, it all worked out...whew.

After the pedis we went over to Claim Jumper for happy hour, I had the PG version of my all-time favorite drink, 'sex on the beach' which they call 'shark on the beach'. Whatever. I guess even restaurants/bars have to be PC these days. We ordered a few appetizers and it was pretty tasty. We caught up on Jenna's new job and all that has been going on in each other's lives. Again, I hate saying goodbye. The good part of saying goodbye to my friends out here is that I know it's not a forever goodbye as I will definitely be back for visits...I truly love it out here and can't imagine never coming back. Who knows, maybe someday I'll move back. You just never know.

It's so funny because the few random people that I've told that I'm moving to New York all tend to think that I'm moving to New York city. It's like I was talking to someone at Starbucks I think, she asked me what I was up to and told her I was in the process of moving to NY, going through a divorce, etc.....and she said something about how I could be like the girls on "Sex & The City". I didn't bother correcting her that I am moving to New York state, not the city. Honestly, I've never even been to the city and although I've never been there, I highly doubt that Lockport is anything like NY city.

At the same time I guess I can't say too much because until I found out that Matt was going to be stationed out here many years ago, I had never really thought much about Washington state or Seattle. I remember thinking 'what in the heck is in Washington state??'. Funny.

So I got my new cell phone the other day. I was surfing the internet and found that I could order my new phone and get my new phone # all on-line. I love the internet. So I chose the Motorola pink razor phone and I love it. It was so easy to activate and now I'm good to go. I also bought one of those blue tooth ear pieces as it's illegal to talk on the phone in your car without something that is hands-free in NY. I have to say that I have a major pet peeve about those little blue tooth ear pieces and I'm sorry if I offend anyone, but the people that wear them constantly look like someone from Star Trek. It drives me c-r-a-z-y when I'm at the grocery store, mall, whatever and I see someone walking around with the darn thing on their ear. I just want to rip it off of them. I will definitely not be one of 'those' people.

Tomorrow I'm either having coffee or lunch with Trenton, not sure which. Then later in the day/evening I'm going to the casino with Kari and then spending the night at her place. Maybe we'll both win big...we can only hope!

I cannot believe that after Sunday I will no longer live here. I have to be honest, getting a divorce and moving back to NY has been something that I've thought about for a very long time. I guess I never thought I'd actually ever get the nerve to do it....maybe I just needed the time to make sure I was doing the right thing. I think part of it is that for so long I didn't feel very good about myself and therefore didn't really do much to make changes or try to make myself happy....but over the last 2 years or so I've really started to feel better about myself and feel comfortable in my skin. I know that I am doing the right thing but I can't help but be sad. It's scary & exciting at the same time. I talked to one of my aunts earlier today, who by the way is in her 60's and never been married, and she told me how I need to remember that a woman doesn't need to have a man in her life to be complete. Umm....okay. I never said I 'needed' a man in my life and I never said I didn't feel complete. I love my aunt to death but since my mom died she has taken over as my surrogate mother and as much as I appreciate it and love her even more for it, my mom would never say such things to me. Oh-well, I know she's just worried and doesn't want me jumping into anything too soon. Which will not happen. I had this 'conversation' with a friend of mine and again with Jenna tonight how I've realized that I don't know how to not be a wife or a girlfriend. I had boyfriends in each grade since 9th grade until I graduated, a couple boyfriends after high school and then dated casually a teeny tiny bit and then boom! got married. So, quite honestly this whole 'dating' thing is really foreign to me. Maybe I can find a "Dating for Dummies" book....I've looked for an instruction manual for a 35 year old divorcee but have yet to find it. ;) Oh-well, I know I'll be fine.

I am very interested in finding some sort of animal shelter or something like that to volunteer at, I think that would be good for me. I love animals and it breaks my heart to see them in cages at shelters, I wish I could rescue them all. And oh my god, has anyone seen that commercial for some sort of dog food where it shows this adorable dog and you hear David Duchovny's voice saying "I'm a good dog, I play fetch, etc...what I don't understand is why I'm in here" and then they show the dog in a cage at a shelter or something. The first time I saw it I had tears rolling down my cheeks and I still get all choked up when I see it. Breaks my heart.
If I ever won the lottery I would buy acres & acres of land somewhere and take in all kinds of animals. I'd also create some sort of free program where people could get their animals spayed & neutered as that is another one of my pet peeves, too many kittens & puppies out there that don't have homes. Just call me Bob Barker. :)

Speaking of animals, I am leaving behind 1 cat...Harley. It makes me very sad to not take him but I can't have 3 cats. Plus it wouldn't be fair to Matt. Harley is 8 years old and I brought him home while Matt was overseas, it was a little too early for him to be taken away from his mother and I think he thinks that I'm his mother. Sydney doesn't like him at all (she doesn't like anyone actually) and there is an invisible barrier around her that he is not allowed to penetrate without her giving him a right hook in the face. Winnie & him curl up together all of the time, Winnie washes his face for him and they both sleep with me. I just don't think Harley would survive the trip, he screams and I mean literally screams bloody murder when he is in a vehicle. He'd either give himself a heart attack or we'd be leaving him somewhere in Montana. I'm sure he'll cope just fine and I'm probably worrying more about it than I should, it just breaks my heart a little to leave him behind. :(

Sorry for getting all melancholy....my time left here in Washington is coming to an end rather quickly and it's very emotional. I just need to remember that I'm doing what is right for ME, what will make me happy and the rest will fall into place. Plus I'm going to have to do a TON of shopping for pretty much everything and what girl doesn't like to shop?? :)

Goodnight....

Thursday

It's Thursday morning, I'm drinking my coffee and totally rocking out to "I'm Coming Out" by Diana Ross. Yesterday I was driving to Nissan of the Eastside to get my car all ready for the big drive and this song came on the radio and I blared the volume....it brought back so many good memories that I had to buy it on iTunes today. I was probably 10 when this song came out but I remember it so well because my mom used to play it over & over again. I particularly remember her playing it on her "boom box" and dancing around, I happened to pass by her room and saw her....she was hysterical. I also remember her listening to it before she would go out with her good friend, Pat. Good times. :)

Things have been crazy the last few days. My emotions have been on a major roller coaster ride, one minute I'm up and the next I want to curl up in the fetal position. I had my last session with my therapist yesterday and she reassured me that all of this is normal....that divorce is like a death and you have to mourn it as you would a death. It helps to know that what I'm feeling is normal but it sure doesn't feel that way when I'm in the middle of one of my full-blown pity parties!

Let's see, what I have I done this week...hmmm. Tuesday I went to see my gal Mary at 88 Kirkland, had my hair trimmed and the color touched up, those darn gray hairs! If anyone is looking for a new hair stylist on the east side, I highly recommend Mary. She's great. After my appt with her I high-tailed it to Totem Lake as I only had 15 minutes to get from the waterfront in Kirkland to Totem Lake and as we all know, traffic out here sucks big time. But I did it with 2 minutes to spare. Proud moment. I don't remember what I did Tuesday night, I know I probably did some sort of packing or whatnot. I did however finish my book, "Hide". Awesome, another recommendation from me.
Yesterday I took my car for service, went to Target to pick up a car charger for my iPod so we can jam all the way across the country. Oh and I had my appointment with my therapist, Renee. Another huge recommendation from me....if anyone is loooking for an awesome, down to earth therapist/counselor....Renee Balodis-Cox is the one for you. I was sad to say goodbye to her! She's in Redmond and if anyone is interested, let me know and I'll be happy to give her info....she can help with absolutely anything and I guarantee, you will love her.

I realized yesterday while talking to her that I am a very loyal person....I kind of knew this about myself prior to that, but it was reinforced. I'm loyal to products, people, friends, etc....it's like Starbucks....everyone who knows me knows how I feel about Starbucks. I don't know if those who know me have ever heard my Fantom vacuum cleaner story....well, I moved back to NY in 95 and was totally addicted to QVC...I mean, I was buying all this random crap that I didn't even know I needed. I knew I had a problem when I bought Easter cookies from QVC, yes from a home shopping channel, that were like $5 each. Yes, I had a problem. Anyways, back to the Fantom. I was totally enticed by their advertisement of this vacuum, I watched how they would use a 'regular' vacuum over a carpet and then take out the Fantom (ooooh, ahhhh) and go over the VERY SAME area on the carpet and WOW!! What it would bring up was just amazing. I had to have one. So I ordered it. After waiting 7 to 10 business days, the Fantom finally arrived and let me tell you it changed my life. I did the demonstration on my own and it so totally worked. After almost 10 happy years with the Fantom, I had to put it to rest. It was a sad moment. Still hurts. But I have moved on to the Dyson, that is my new obsession. Oh, and speaking of appliances....bought a new iron. I am very anal about ironing, I iron everything. I bought a new one, it's called "The Shark". The name says it all.

Maybe it's not so much loyalty as being a major dork! :) ha ha

So, I was supposed to go out to dinner with Trenton tonight. He called yesterday and said that him & Mel (his girlfriend) are going to stay another night in Ocean Shores (who wouldn't?) and would it be okay if we did lunch on Friday? So, that's the plan.

Then a few hours later Jenna sent me a text to see what I was up to and to plan a get together, we're going to get together for pedi's and happy hour this evening at Claim Jumper's. It'll be great to catch up!

I decided yesterday that I am physically, mentally, emotionally and every other kind of "-ly" exhausted that I could possibly be. Divorce is not fun, even under the best circumstances. Nor is moving cross country and leaving most of your stuff behind. I'm totally okay with it though, it's what I wanted....it's just a little overwhelming to think about all the stuff I have to buy. It'll be fun though, my friend Darcy & I are going to go shopping once I get back in town.

Tomorrow night I am hanging out with my wonderful friend Kari, we're going to go to the casino, have a pizza and I'm going to spend the night. I am so looking forward to it!! It's so funny because I've known Kari for as long as I had worked at Medtronic (6+ years) but it hasn't been until the last year or so that we've really gotten close and I'm so happy, I only wish we had gotten closer sooner. It was funny, last summer we met for coffee while I was out on medical leave from my back surgery and we ended up sitting there talking for at least 2 hours.....we talked like we had known each other forever, it was awesome. Kari rocks! :)

Tomorrow morning we're taking my boxes to UPS to get them on their way. I am very afraid to see how much it's going to cost, yikes!! Oh-well, it's less than moving a whole household across country, I have to keep that in mind.

I'm going to finish my coffee and try to get one more box together.

In the words of Diana Ross: "The time has come for me to break out of this shell, I have to shout that I am coming out.....I'm coming out, I want the world to know, I've got to let it show...." :) ha ha....rock on people, rock on!